Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Young People in Old People's Bodies

As you might imagine life is pretty busy for us nowadays. From having two energetic toddlers (no longer one little baby who will just lay in one place) and church taking a lot of our time as usual, Andrew has been taking a class on How to Teach the Bible at our church.

So, Monday evenings after dinner, Andrew studies. Tuesdays we have dinner with whoever at church, Wednesday is prayer meeting, Thursday is Andrew's class, Friday is family night or date night, Saturday night we prepare for Sunday worship, and Sunday night we go to Home Groups (Bible study). Even though we get to talk a lot during lunch when he works from home and dinner and driving to and from places, I still felt like I wanted more special time with Andrew than just date night every other week. So on Monday I sent Andrew a meeting notice through our electronic calenders that every night at 9:30 we have to have two dances together. We put on Jazz, the room is lit by Christmas lights, and we have instant atmosphere. It's been so fun! I look forward to having that little date with him all day long.

I can't believe our four year wedding anniversary is coming up this January. I mean, can you believe it? So much has happened. Our wedding pictures used to be on my screen saver until I got a new laptop this September. We used to say, "'Isn't it funny that one day we will look at these pictures and say, 'Look how young we looked.'" Ugggh, that day has arrived. (I thought I wouldn't say that till I was 60.) Not only that, but two weeks ago, when I was looking at the emails Andrew and I used to write each other when I was in the Philippines for six months, I thought, "I can't believe how young we were back then!" We were so clueless about just about everything. I used to read those old emails all the time, and they never seemed silly to me before. How did I suddenly get so old so recently?

As busy as the children keep me and as much as parents tell me it will get easier once the children get a little older, sometimes I wish time would go slower. I don't want to get any further away from our wedding day or from the days our babies were born, because I imagine the further we get, the memories will become like faded photographs. Like looking back on your childhood, and all the clothes are out of style and you cannot re-visit those times. Everything has changed, the people, the places. But I wish our memories could always look vivid and current. I wish we had camcorders that recorded in 3D and we could go back to our wedding reception and stand among everyone on the dance floor and do a 360 of the room, see what people were doing at the different tables, catch new details. I don't want to long for my babies to be my babies again. I want them always to be my babies!

Nonetheless, I think having toddlers is the oldest age there is. Because my sister is 7 years older than me, but her three kids are ages 7 to 11, and she feels younger and better than she ever has. I talk to the older ladies at church who are in their 70's, and they say their only reminder that they are actually old is their reflection in the mirror. They feel like young people in an old person's body. On the other hand, I have a 24 year old friend, and she has two babies one year apart. She feels really old.

Does life seem to be moving super fast for any of you? I know different people of all different age groups read this blog, so it would be interesting to hear the different view points depending on what stage of life people are in.

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Minnesota Snow

Well, what we have been anticipating since our arrival has finally alighted: Minnesota winter. And with winter has come the snow. Growing up in New Jersey, I loved snow, because to me, it meant no school, which of course freed me up to see the beauty in it. I loved how the snow silenced everything, carried your whisper across the yard, and blanketed everything in white. It was so serene. I knew that the fact that I had never had to drive in it, though, was probably a luxury that preserved my love for it and was the difference between my opinion of snowstorms and that of adults. I only had my license for one winter before I moved to California for college, and I don't think my parents let me drive in the snow.

I went to Ladies Bible study this morning with the kids. Afterwards, as we left the church, snow was falling fast and was covering the ground. What wasn't obvious was that it was sleeting at the same time. So not only was snow all over the roads, piling up faster than they were continuously plowing it, but ice was mixing in with it. So far, all four of the people I talked to today slid out of control, either doing a 360 or driving off the side of the road. Needless to say, I did not enjoy one of my first experiences driving in the snow. I am so thankful that the Lord really took care of all of us.

Knowing how dangerous it was to drive outside, today I am feeling the way I did right after Andrew finished cancer treatments. I feel so sensitive to how blessed we are to have our two children and for Andrew and I to be together, all of us are healthy, and still alive. It feels like a celebration just to be together and I just wanted to sit and read books to the kids, hold them, and keep telling them I love them. I always want them to know that. If there is one thing they remember from this early time of their lives, I hope it is that I love them with all my heart.

Just now, A.J. ran up to me screaming, "Hugs! Lot of hugs!" They have just returned with Papa after playing in the snow, filling A.J.'s dump truck with it. They love it. So, as long as I can avoid driving in it, I think we as a family can continue to say that we love it and it's beautiful.